I missed the goal…and I will not judge

I missed the goal…and I will not judge.

After England’s loss last week, I was due to write the weekly newsletter. I’d committed to writing weekly to the community since January 2021 and I couldn’t do it. I just couldn’t write the newsletter. I was tired, deflated and thoughtful. 


To win the final of the Euros meant a lot and I thought England were set to win. They certainly were the better team all round in my eyes but we just couldn’t quite finish it. 

I recall watching my first football game in 1996 when England lost to Germany. I was in year 6 at the time, the same age as my eldest son now and I cried. On Sunday, I really wanted England to win for my children as much as for me. I think we were all keen to celebrate but as I watched Marcus Rashford step forward, kick and hit the post, I wanted it so much more for him. After the year he has spent standing up for what he believes in and fighting for others, I prayed that he would score for himself. He deserved it more than anything. 


As the realisation hit me, that it just wasn’t to be, my son turned to me and said “after everything he’s done, I really wanted him to score” and after the last 48 hours clearly that is what so many others thought too. 

We do not judge Marcus Rashford (or any of the other England footballers) in that moment for missing a penalty, that was one fluke moment. Rashford is loved for the person that he is and what he has accomplished for so many. He is a superstar to so many not because he is a talented footballer but because he is kind, compassionate and determined. 


As a parent, I would be so so proud for my children to follow in his footsteps, stand up for their beliefs and share kindness and compassion with others. 

That is what true heroes are made of. 


On a personal note, I may have missed the goal myself and not lived up to my own expectations and not sent out the routine Monday morning newsletter that I had committed to each week, however I release that self judgement. I know that even if we sometimes do not meet our own standards that we set, we fail in our own eyes or in the eyes of others, it is just one moment in time and we are all worth so much more than that one moment. 

Let’s get back up, embrace self compassion and accept that we are only humans trying to do the best that we can possibly do in any given moment. 

Kindness will always shine through.


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